And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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