Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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