Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize