Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
I FOUND THE LEGS
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
