You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
This is classic penis vs brain.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
