She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Randomize