Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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