I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Randomize