I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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