i will never coherently bang her
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
