fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Randomize
