went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Every concussion has its silver lining
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
