i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize
