i just google imaged poop.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Randomize