What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
