we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
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