Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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