So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Randomize
