Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
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