i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
His hands were made for my vagina.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
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