similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize
