i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Randomize
