She's JV to your varsity
You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
babies were throwing up all over the place
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
