I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
