We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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