So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
