let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Randomize
