We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
I just found puke in my bra..
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Randomize
