I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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