Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
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