New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Randomize
