He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Randomize