gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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