it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
