yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
Randomize
