I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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