Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Randomize
