dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
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