you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
