How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
