"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I just saw a hot homeless man
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Randomize
