you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
