dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
