Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
