jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Randomize
