That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
