I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize