forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Randomize
