he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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