I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
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